Holy Swiffer, Batman!!

I was looking around my house today, you know, the one I've only lived in for about 3 months. I was amazed at how many things I am already in the habit of overlooking; the marks on the wall by the couch, the dings in the wall from the furniture, the spot on the carpet in Scamp's room. You know, little things. I guess you could just say the house is finally beginning to look lived in. When I took a closer look I saw things that I had seen so many times I no longer saw them.

All this pondering led me down another road. How many things in our life do we live with just because we are so comfortable with them that we don't even really see them anymore? Are there things in my heart that are so obvious to others that I don't even see anymore? If someone pointed them out to me would I say "oh, yeah, that's been there forever! I'll get around to fixing it sooner or later"? Who and what am I really living with? We must be careful not to become so relaxed with the tenants who share our hearts that we fail to evict them just because we are comfortable. They don't really cause us that much trouble. That's what we tell ourselves. "Sure, I have a little unforgivness in here, but he's really no trouble at all. He just rents a small little room, a closet, really, and I never hear anything out of him". That's a dangerous place to be, folks. Like a termite, unforgivness will eat it's way into the walls of your heart, hardening them and making them impenetrable to the Holy Spirit. Do we let Anger park in our garage? Self-Pity have a room in the attic? Gossip camp out on the couch and has kitchen privileges?

Have you ever gotten your house ready to sell? As you start going from room to room you start to see your home through the eyes of others. Suddenly, things are looking a little different. What you thought was just cozy, you can see how others would perceive as cramped. What you see at shabby chic, others just see as shabby. So it is with our hearts. It's important to take time to do a heart check. David said in Psalm 139:23, "Search me, O God, and know my heart". Would our hearts look any different through the eyes of someone else, of the Lord? Would our "humbleness" be shown to actually be self-pity? Would our "righteous indignation" be reveled to just be plain anger? How about when we are "discerning the body"? Are we actually just plain ol gossiping?

I think it's time for some house cleaning in my heart. I try to remember the word says in Jeremiah 17:9 -" The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked. Who can know it?" I am going to spend some time asking the Lord to open my eyes to look at my heart the way He sees it. I've got a feeling it will be completely different from the way I see it.

I have a long habit of seeing things the way I want to see them. I'm afraid my children have inherited this trait. Yesterday, when Scamp got home from school, I asked him about his day. He informed me he was moved to the second discipline level during the day. (they go from 3 down to 1, the hope being we can stay on 3 all day!) When I asked him what he did, he said he really didn't remember, he might have said something to someone that wasn't nice, but he was sure he didn't mean it. Only 5 years old and already justifying and covering up his behavior. Sometimes I wonder why God made this child so beautiful and so charming all at the same time. It makes it really difficult to fuss at him when he flashes those blue eyes! lol

Unfortunately, there are no mini-maids or cleaning services for the soul. I've got to take things out, look at them, and take them to the Lord for a dunk in his cleansing blood. It washes away every stain, every blemish, every bit of grime and dust we gather as we walk here on earth.

I've got to go, now, my house needs a good cleaning. I wonder if the Bible mentions a Swifer for the soul????

Soaked in His blessings,
Spokenfor

Room For Rent

A house with many rooms,
numerous people crowded in,
always opposing one another,
fighting battles none can win.

Anger's room is at hall's end
right across from Fear's domain.
Twins Depression and Despair live
around the corner, just below Insane.

Terror willingly abides throughout
while Shame welcomes all who enter.
Past Regrets controls everyone
with Grief serving as her mentor.

Happiness, Peace, Joy, Love
never darken porch nor door.
Broken Hearts overgrow the path,
Past Relationships litter the floor.

Till the Holy Spirit comes rushing in
bringing Christ's cleansing blood.
Evicting the darkness dwelling within
making all shine with the light of His love.

A Couch Full of Mashed Potatoes

I was going to write about procrastination, but I decided to do that later.

You wanna hear something slightly disturbing??? It's less than 3 months till Christmas! I have friends ( I use the word loosely as they make me look really bad!) who have already started their shopping. Every year I say I'm going to get started early, but I never do. My kids always end up with the hottest toy........... from last year! It's usually just about the only thing left by the time I get around to shopping the day before Christmas eve. This year, I decided to do things differently. So far, that is what I have done; decided to do things differently, not actually done anything differently.

On another note, I need some feedback, some advise, some borrowed wisdom, if you will. I have once again decided to enter the world of painting. Now, before you go envisioning canvases everywhere covered in amazing pieces of artwork worthy of any museum, let me clarify. I mean my dinning room. Gone are the days when I could have jumped in, cleaned and painted the room and had it all put back together in a morning. I'm old now, these things take time. Because it's a project that will, in all honesty, probably take the better part of a week, I want to get the color right the first time. Once I get color on the walls it's gonna stay for a while unless one of you guys wants to come up and repaint it! Should I go earthy with golden browns, tans, or greens, or should I go bold with something like a hunter green or maybe one raspberry wall? Maybe I should go light and airy (kind of like me) and choose a pastel. I'm not sure how my boys would react to the last option. Give me some help here, people! I admit to being a decorating wanna be so I depend on the insight of others to help with these difficult, life altering, mind blowing decisions. What's that? You say I need to get a life?? Tell me about it!

I'm thinking of starting to walk every morning again. I'm thinking about it, I haven't actually done it yet. I have a sister-in-law who just ran a 15K. She's awesome like that. Me? Not so much. She suggested I give running a try, said it would be great for me. I told her if I am running, it's because something is chasing me. I. don't. run. Have you ever heard that saying "it's hard to stop a train"? Well it would sort of apply here. Once you get this much bulk moving at any speed at all, it's no easy feat to stop it! There is another very good reason for this, my life's mantra. It's not because I wouldn't like to feel the freedom of running. I can see it now, I'm running through the woods on a perfect fall day, dressed in the latest running fashions, of course, wind blowing through my long, blonde hair. See me as I float along effortlessly while my little woodland friends, the birds, squirrels, and chipmonks cheer me on. I finish my 10 miles without breaking a sweat and arrive back home to my gorgeous husband meeting me on the back deck with a big glass of water and a light lunch he has prepared of salad greens and fresh fruit while surrounded by my perfect adoring children. Now fast forward into real life. That would be me in the stained sweats and t-shirt, soaking wet, huffing and puffing, after I've been chased by the neighbor's dog and laughed at by the neighborhood children, all while going to the mailbox and back. If I start running, it'll be because I'm running from my kids, or maybe I could start running from responsibility, or commitment. There's all kinds of things I could run from, all while not leaving my couch. I think I will keep with my exercise routine of jumping to conclusions and running my mouth and walking to the kitchen and back.

Today is Monday, start of a new week. Once again, the laundry is piled up, the house is a mess, and I sit here at my laptop happily ignoring it all.

What I really need around here is an adult to take care of the boring, important stuff. Anyone up for the job? I can pay you in unused exercise clothes and equipment.

Send your resume addressed to the couch potato. I'm sure I'll get it.

Soaked in His blessings,
Spokenfor

Why You Should Always Lock Your Cabinets!

My kids are a constant source of joy in my life. Let me rephrase, I am always thankful for my children. Let me try that one more time, there are times when I tolerate the little people who came from my body and now reside in my house. Do you kids ever embarrass you? I think mine have it down to a fine art. After raising so many boys I've become immune to a lot of it. You know, the stuff like when they smack each other in public, or wear their jeans so baggy their underwear show. No problem, you're the one who looks foolish, not me! I can so handle those times. I'm talking about the moments you want to crawl under the carpet and pretend you never had time to procreate.

I remember one such time when Monkey Boy was about 5 years old. We were having some kind of party/family gathering at our house. We had about 40 people there. With so many people around, half of them extended family I was guilty of not watching him very closely as I figured if he started gushing blood or exploded into flames or threatened anyone with his pocket knife someone around would either handle it or let me know about it. It turns out, not so much. I was in the opposite end of the house, of course, when I heard a good bit of laughter coming from the living room. I remember smiling and thinking to myself what a wonderful hostess I was that people were having such a great time talking and laughing. While I was patting myself on the back, my 5 year old was, in fact, providing the entertainment. He came sauntering in the kitchen to ask for a drink. I looked down at him and suddenly understood why everyone was laughing. It seems he had gotten a scratch somehow and felt, as all 5 yr olds do, that it immediately deserved a band-aid and, being such a big boy, he would just handle that himself. The only problem with this line of thought was he couldn't reach them. However, being so ingenious, he discovered the perfect solution. There, in Mom's bathroom was a little bag under the sink with the biggest band-aids he had ever seen! Each one was folded and wrapped in it's own little wrapper. He thought "Mom's been holding out on me! She's saving all the really good band-aids for herself!". Being so proud of his discovery he had to remove his shirt so everyone could see how big he was with his really big band-aid, before he strolled through 40 people to find me. Imagine my horror upon seeing my cute little boy covered in maxi pads! People were laying on the floor laughing. There were those who needed oxygen and one uncle whom I thought was going to need a defibrillator! I have never lived this down, and neither has he. He's almost a teenager now and claims to have absolutely no memory of the event, but the red on his face whenever it comes up tells a different story!

I'm no stranger to such deeds as this either, albeit unintentional, so Monkey Boy comes by it naturally. I remember in Wyoming a time I wanted to crawl in a hole and pull it in over me. We had moved to a new house and found we needed a new cable for the tv to replace one that had broken during the move. So, one Saturday afternoon I headed out to the local Radio Shack to secure the needed tv watching supplies. I was so proud of myself because I had remember to bring the old one with me so I was sure to get the right kind. I entered a very crowded store and, after a little bit of a wait, was approached by a young man, who, if out of high school was not by much. When he asked me what I needed, I replied, "I need another one of these" as I so proudly whipped the broken cord from my purse. Unfortunately, little did I know it had become tangled around, you guessed it, a giant maxi pad! As I whipped (there really is no other word the way I did it) it from my purse the pad came flying out with it, hit a gentleman standing close by in the back of his bald head, and landed at the feet of the poor, confused teenager. I'll never forget the look on the face of the bald man as he turned around to find out what was being thrown at him. At that point I prayed God would just rapture me right out of there. I can tell the story now without dying of mortification, but it was touch and go there for a while!

I've sometimes wondered if God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit sit around and tell stories about their kids. I can hear it now, "remember the time....." and they all laugh. I'm sure, if that's true, I have supplied them with endless hours of material to talk about.

I guess if you can't laugh at yourself you'll spend too much time crying!

Excuse me now, I think I left the bathroom cabinets unlocked and I just remembered I now have another 5 year old in the house. I'd better go take care of that!

Soaked in His blessings,
Spokenfor

Changing Your Mind and Unloading Your Wagon

There was a huge church picnic today. I have to admit, it was a little rough for me. My kids would say it was an "epic failure"! Oh, don't get me wrong, the picnic itself was great. The food was yummy, (even if there was not a drop of real sauce at this "bar-b-que"! must be a North Carolina thing!) and everyone was super nice. The weather was clear, although it was hot as blue blazes, but I, once again, succumbed to my insecurities and found myself sitting on the outside looking in. Maybe it was the fact that it was so hot, maybe it was the fact that I still don't know many people very well, maybe it was the fact I was tired, didn't like what I was wearing and my shoes were too tight. It could have been any number of things. That's what I like to tell myself, but, inside, I know better. Once again the little demons of "what if they don't like me?" and "they don't really want to know me" and "if I talk to someone I'll just say something stupid" reared their ugly head. You may know them, I know them well. I'm also getting a little tired of them telling me how to live my life. It's just, well, I know them. They've been around for as long as I can remember and I really can't imagine life without them, but I'd like to. I don't want, at the end of my life, to look back and realize I missed out on so much because of fear; fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of looking like a fool. I want to live life in a big way, the way I live it in my head.

I remember when I was young, you know, around the time of the dinosaurs, when the world should have been rife with possibilities. For me, it wasn't. There were, uuhh, how do I say this, certain restrictions put on me because of where we were in life as a family. Don't get me wrong, some very good things came out of the life we were living, but sometimes, I can't help but grieve for what could have been and never had a chance to be.

It was all complicated by the young man who destroyed my innocence when I was only 5 years old. He'll never know how what happened in that tool shed changed me inside. It took years for me to look at it clearly, to acknowledge the damage done to my little soul in only one afternoon. He left a deposit there that would remain for 30 years before God dug it out and threw it away. Complete healing, however, is a process. When you've spent 30 years acting and reacting a certain way, even after there's healing, there's the habits of living that have to be changed. We live as we think so, you could say, changing our mind is what is necessary. The Bible puts it another way; Romans 12:2 (amplified Bible)

²Do not be conformed to this world (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight for you].

It's the renewing of our minds that changes us. The shame that followed me, the feeling of always being different, of being damaged somehow has been healed by God. I have been set free by his amazing grace, yet, I still find myself falling into the same habits and patterns of behavior. I believe, as my mind is changed, renewed, if you will, by his word, these habits and patterns will fall by the way side as well. However, I have an active part in it. There's something for me to do. I have to see them for what they are, outdated, no longer necessary self-preservation behaviors, and do something about it. I have to have my mind renewed, my thinking changed.

We've all seen the burger commercial where they spout the old saying "change is good". Well, change may be good, but it's seldom easy! Admittedly, it would just be easier to say "this is the way I am, the way I've always been, it's all I know". However, when God calls us into something new, we can rarely accomplish all He has for us if we are dragging tons of baggage He's already made a way for us to off-load. I don't know about you, but I'm getting a little tired of dragging along a bag someone else packed for me. It gets exhausting in a hurry! God has broken the chains that bound it to me so I'm just gonna let it drop right here and start building a new outlook.

Take a good look at the picture at the top of this post. Do you really think that donkey is going anywhere fast? I think that is the way we look sometimes in the spiritual. We've allowed our wagon to get so loaded there's no way we can go anywhere! God says in Matthew 11:28 - 30 "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. ²⁹Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. ³⁰For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." God's wagon will never tip you over with it's weight!

My goal this week will be to purposefully unload my wagon and work on changing my mind. My goal will also be to work on not purposefully changing my mind about unloading my wagon! lol I'm old, set in my ways, change doesn't come easy to me, but the potential rewards are luring me in. Look at the passage above. Notice anything in verse 29? It tells us the way to find peace is simply to learn of Him, "learn of me.....and ye shall find rest for your souls". I don't know about you, but I'm ready for some rest for my soul!

So, go learn of Him, it'll help unload your wagon.

Meanwhile, I find myself strangely craving oats with a side of hay.........

Soaked in His blessings,

Spokenfor

Happy Feet and Colored Contacts

Pastor Awesome and Mrs Awesome came to our house tonight. We wanted them to pray over and bless our new home. It was a great time of fellowship and prayer. Part way through their visit I was hit with a stunning revelation. These people are the first pastors I have ever been around where I was completely comfortable! Don't get me wrong, the pastors of my past were some great men of God. None of them had horns, breathed fire, levitated, moved objects with their minds, were prone to wild fits of hysteria, none of them. There wasn't even a case of b.o. or bad breath that comes to mind, well, there was this one...... never mind. My point is I have been away from a certain place (some of you know where) for long enough that I no longer fear being dragged to the front of the church and having my mail read for the entire congregation. I have learned to trust again. For me, that is HUGE! I am finally in a place where I feel safe, safe to be who I am, safe to trust the man God has put over me is not going to annihilate me emotionally, simply put, I am safe.

I thank God he sent us to North Carolina. It's not been an easy road, I'm not going to lie, it's been tough in a lot of ways. However, I am now starting to see some wonderful benefits from our move. I am learning who I am, not who I could be, should be, or want to be, but who I am. It's important for us to move in the giftings the Father has given us. How can we do that if we are afraid to admit they are there? Knowing yourself, I believe, is a big step towards knowing God and how He wants you to live your life. Take me for instance, (since I'm the one writing, it seems only natural to use me as an example, live with it! lol) I am not a quiet person. Now, I know that comes as a shock to some of you, but hear me out. I love to laugh, I love even more to make other people laugh. I love to get excited, to shout, to sing, to live exuberantly! I believe it's one of my biggest strengths, but also, one of my biggest weaknesses. I find it hard, at times, to be as subdued as some situations call for. I have friends who are so sweet, really sweet, not fakey sweet. We all know people like that. They go through life with a sweet smile, never getting too upset, never really loosing their temper, staying steady and calm. The commander is like that. I, am soooo not. I can force myself, to a certain extent to take on an air of peaceful sweetness for a time, but sooner or later (usually sooner) my true colors show through. It has sometimes caused me trouble and I have wanted so badly to be one of the calm people in the world. I am who I am. I am who God made me. I have to do and be what he made me for, not anyone else.

Have you ever seen someone with colored contacts in? Your brown eyed co-worker shows up one day with stunningly blue eyes. It may be beautiful, but it's not real, it's an illusion. I believe we need to come to the place where we can look at our giftings, personality, intelligence, the list goes on and on, the same way we look at something as simple as the color of our eyes. I can love the fact my eyes are green. I can play it up with make-up or hair styles but I can't really take credit for it. It is what it is. I can put in blue contacts that make my eyes the color of a fall sky, but underneath, they're still green. I've only covered up what God has made me to be. That's the way it is when we are reluctant to admit to and develop the gifts and talents God has given us. We are only covering up what He has made, we're not actually changing anything. There's no reason to be proud of my green eyes, I had nothing to do with their coloring, just as I had nothing to do with the fact the Father blessed me with a good voice. I have hidden for years from my giftings, partly from fear of straying into pride, but partly from fear of not being worthy of them. Now that's just plain silly! Who has ever opened a present on Christmas morning only to turn and hand it back to the giver and say "I'm not worthy" or "I'm afraid I'll be too proud of it"?

We need to relax. There is a peace in being who you are, the authentic you, the you God made you to be, not the you you want to be, but the you you already are. If you are loud, be loud, be happy, spread your joy and sunshine. Slather it on everyone you meet. Don't be ashamed of it. If you're quieter, reserved, don't try to be anything else, it only comes across as stilted and forced. Spread your peace and quiet contentment to all you meet. If you can sing, then sing! If you can dance, then dance! If you can teach, teach or preach or witness or draw or paint, or write, or take pictures, or host someone in your home or whatever God has given you the ability to do. To take a phrase from popular media; Just Do It!

In 1 Corinthians 12 Paul writes of the gifts of the Spirit. The different gifts are given to different people in the body. He was speaking of spiritual gifts, but I believe this goes for gifts in the natural as well. The gifts are all different, but they come from the same spirit and for the same reason; to edify the body. How ridiculous would it be for someone to try to make their nose act as their ears? or their ears to act as their mouth? But that is what we do so many times. Each body needs it's ears to act as ears, it's eyes to act as eyes. Each spiritual body needs those who teach or sing or host or praise or vacuum or clean the bathrooms or run after the rug rats in the nursery. The eyes are so small in relation to the rest of the body, but can you imagine being without them? It may seem like a lowly job to clean the toilets at church, but can you imagine if there were no one to do it? Take joy in your purpose.

I am reminded of a children's movie I once saw called "Happy Feet". It was all about a small penguin blessed with the gift of dance but born into a flock of singing penguins. He struggled to fit in, to be accepted, but it was truly awful when he tried to sing. In the end, though, it was his unique gift that saved the entire flock from being wiped out and netted him the pretty girl penguin to boot. His feet were, indeed, happy. He couldn't sing, but he also couldn't not dance. That's where I want to be. I want to be so in tune with the Lord I can't not do what he created me to do nor be anything other than what he created me to be.

I am going to make it a point to start to thank God for me, for who I am, for who he made me to be. I will strive to not be ashamed of who I am, for I am in Him.

Now, the size of my thighs, that's a different matter. That's all my doing...........

Until next time stay,

Soaked in His blessings,
Spokenfor

Sometimes I feel like a nut.........

"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character." - Albert Einstein

I can across this quote the other day and I had to sit and ponder it for a while. Character and the building of it, is not something we hear a lot about these days. It's not "PC", not cool or hip, or "fly" as my kids say, anymore. When did it go out of style to be a person of integrity? After all, that is how we could describe someone of strong character, isn't it?

Character is something that is built on a daily basis. It's what is being built when no one is around to watch what you are doing and how you are acting or reacting. It's about what is going on inside your heart. If character were an oak tree, attitude would be it's acorn. Have you ever found yourself having a bad day that you just can't seem to shake? The dog wakes you up at 5am, your car won't start, your kids are begging for last minute homework help, the coffee maker won't work, it goes on and on and on. By the time you get on your way, you're late, and when someone cuts you off in traffic you explode. You call down all sorts of calamities upon their head, even if it's silently. The heart is never silent to God. You go on through your day snapping at people, having no patience and a hard shell starts to develop around your heart. Left that way, over time, your heart starts to harden and you become your snappy attitude; always thinking everyone else has it better, easier and they're all out to get you.

Your day could have gone a little differently. This time, when the dog wakes you, you take time to appreciate the sunrise God created. When your car won't start you realize you can slow down, wait for a repair and not rush into a panic. You can thank God your kids want your help and, if they're teenagers, be amazed they deem you smart enough to help them. Once you're on your way you stop and treat yourself to a Starbucks since the coffee maker wasn't working. You reach your destination, maybe a little late, but relaxed and peaceful.

How many of us have lived out either scenario above or at least something similar? Life is not easy, things go wrong, but we don't have to be at the mercy of our emotions and attitude. I'm not saying I'm always living out the second scenario, truth be told, sometimes it's more like the first, but usually it's somewhere in between. The attitude we choose to live our life with will eventually define us. From an irritable attitude can grow self-pity and martyrdom which will foster a sense of entitlement. An arrogant attitude will harden our hearts, squeezing out any empathy that may be there and causing us to scoff at others less fortunate.

Why is this matter of character so important? Beyond the simple fact that living with character makes for a happier life, we need it if we are to be any good to the kingdom. It's important to allow God to develop the character needed to carry the gifts and callings He has chosen for us. To do otherwise is to court trouble. God blesses men and women of good character. The word of God tells us "Moral character makes for smooth traveling" (Proverbs 11:5 The Message Bible).

All this talk of character and the building thereof had me thinking again. It's something I try not to do too often, I get a headache. How is character built? Where does it come from? We have to turn again to the word of God. In Romans 5: 3-5 "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." If you're honest and you're anything at all like I am, that scripture made you groan and want to hide your head in the sand because it all started with suffering! It's kind of like that virtue called patience; we all want it, but since "tribulation worketh patience" we don't want to pray for it!! But the benefits outweigh the pains.

It has to become something we work on daily. Every time we choose the right attitude we're watering that little acorn of character. Every time we over look someone else's faults or slights against us that little acorn gets a little more of what it needs to grow into an oak. Sure, it takes time and effort, but be assured, it's worth it. Do you want God to be your shield? Proverbs 2:7 says the answer is to walk with integrity. There's quite a list of the benefits of living a life of character. All the following are found in Proverbs; 2:7 God will be your shield, 11:3 guidance, 11:20 God relishes integrity, 20:7 blessings on our children, 14:32 integrity creates a safe place to live.

I want to be a person of character, of integrity. Do you? Are you willing to let God work in your heart to build the character the he wants to have there? Are you willing to make the hard choices concerning your attitudes on a daily basis? Are you willing to spend time watering that little acorn with the "miracle grow" of the word of God? If you are, then I know the Lord will be faithful to grow that tiny acorn into a towering oak tree of character, one that dominates the landscape of your life and draws people in. Then God will pour out the richness of all His blessings on you and on your family.

So the next time someone calls you a nut, just look them dead in the eye, give them a big smile and say "thank you very much"!

Soaked in His blessings,
Spokenfor



Proverbs 22:1 - A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.

Aaah-choo!!!

It was a lovely Sunday morning service. It was a nice Sunday family lunch. It was an ok Sunday all around, until..... until the mother of all colds decided to settle upon me and beat me up from the inside out! So, what I'm trying to say, nicely, is, GO AWAY! don't go away mad, just go away, and pray for me while you do! For a while I was afraid I was going to die, and now I'm a little afraid I won't. I'm going to bed, I suggest you do the same.

C-ya
Spokenfor