(the guilty one)
It's raining. It's a rainy Saturday afternoon and I am not napping. Instead, I am sitting in my (newly painted and, might I say, beautiful!) office. Why, you ask? Have you ever been so filled up, that if you didn't let something out, you were going to bust a gut? (It's a southern saying, let your imagination work on it) That pretty much describes me this afternoon.
It was the weekend of our annual women's/teen girl's conference at church and, as always, Pastor Laura puts on a heck of shindig!
I arrived at the church Friday afternoon along with about 40 other women. I stopped off at the registration desk to pick up all the swag the ladies had been so cool to fix up for me. There was the obligatory note pad and pen (presumably so we could jot down all the cool stuff we heard), a schedule of events (so we could be sure we were always in the right place at the right time), a few peppermints (so those praying for us would not be slain in the spirit by all the coffee breath), and a pink t-shirt. In my case, a large, pink t-shirt.
The first session was entitled "Hot and Holy Matrimony". I went in, found a seat and sat like a baby bird with my mouth open to the ceiling waiting to be fed. Those who know me have seen me sit like that before, but usually around the buffet table, but that is a different blog all together. I had never heard our speaker, Deanna Shroder, but when she walked up in a leopard print jacket, skinny jeans and stilettos, I developed an instant girl crush! I can no longer wear shoes like that. As I aged and gave birth to so many
I have never thought of myself as a prude, I'm not one to giggle over the anatomically correct names for body parts or blush when my pastor's wife mentioned "divine fellowship" in our marriage sermon. All of that flies out the window, however, when you bring in the "O" word. I realize this was a group of married (mostly) women, sitting in a women's conference, listening to a teaching entitled "HOT and holy matrimony". All that aside, I don't know that I will ever reach the point where I can hear that word, that many times, IN THE CHURCH. I felt a little like I did in 6th grade when I decided I was grown up enough to use the "F" word. It came out of my mouth one time. The coolness factor is greatly reduced when you then turn and look around to be sure your mom didn't hear you! That's kind of the way it was during this teaching. I kept expecting to hear my mother calling out to me from the sound booth upstairs and I was sure she would be using my full name like she did the time she caught me shutting my little brother up in the dryer. But, again, I digress......
We had a couple of really great sessions yesterday afternoon and a wonderfully anointed service last night. I went home tired, but excited for what the Lord had in store for the next day.
This morning, I got up to a quiet house. Everyone else was still sleeping and the house had that peaceful, all is right with the world, feeling. I had laid my clothes out the night before. We were all supposed to wear our pink t-shirts so I pulled out my fairly new mint green jeans and pink tennis shoes to complete my oh so fashionable outfit. I guess I spent a little too much time enjoying my cup of coffee and facebook because I suddenly realized I was running out of time and would have to put a move on! I was glad I had laid everything out the night before. I rushed through my make-up, argued with my hair a little and then grabbed my clothes. I don't know why I bought mint green jeans. After the 80's I said I would never buy colored denim again. I had a sudden desire for big hair and leg warmers. They always said the higher your hair, the closer to Jesus, but another blog, again. With not much time to spare, I slipped my t-shirt on, or I should I say I attempted to slip my t-shirt on. You see, when I filled out my initial registration paperwork I was going to request a certain size shirt. (no, I will not tell you what size I wear! I can't believe you would even ask!) The person working the registration table (the one that was once a friend of mine!) said "oh no! you don't need that size! You need the size below that!" I tried to tell her she was wrong, but she just kept on and on and on and eventually, my vanity overtook my common sense and I ordered the size she told me to. That's how I found myself with only minutes to spare and a shirt whose arms fit more like gloves than sleeves. I looked like a large, pink sausage. I have had more attractive moments in my life. This was not, however, my first morning being fat. I knew what to do. I started pulling and tugging and stretching that shirt. J wasn't quite sure what to think about the noises flowing from behind the bathroom door. He wasn't sure if I was getting dressed or passing a kidney stone!
I did eventually get that shirt to the point where could wear it, of course, it now has no seams in the arms, but I can wear it without scaring any small children I might meet. Today's conference was wonderful. The Lord moved and I was blessed to spend time with his children in his presence. But here's the deal - I almost missed it. When I was staring in my early morning mirror at a large hunk of pink breakfast meat, I very nearly gave up and went back to bed. I certainly did not want to be the only one not wearing pink. I knew that room was going to look like the energizer bunny had given birth to a multitude of pink offspring, who then congregated all in one room and I didn't want to be the one who stood out, not that I have to be miss-dressed to stand out!
I could have let that little shirt mishap, and I do mean little, keep me from my blessing. I could have climbed right back into my comfy bed. I could have been satisfied to have a cool new pink cleaning rag and a few extra hours of sleep. I could have, but I chose not to. How many times have we allowed a speed bump to take on the proportions of mountain in our lives? Why do we allow a pebble to derail our locomotive? a single raindrop ruin our parade, a tiny tap pop our balloon, a, a, a,.... okay, I'm out of metophores! But you get the picture! It's time to become women of resolve! It's time to set our face to the prize and let nothing stop us from gaining entrance into his presence. Let us not be turned away from anything the Lord has for us by anything the enemy can throw at us. It's happens every day. Are you surprised when you sit down with the word and the phone rings, or the baby wakes up or someone knocks on the door, or you have to go pull your 3 yr old off the top of a 30 foot windmill? Oh! does that last one only happen to me? sorry! that's a story for a different time! My point is, we have a foe, a defeated foe, but a foe nonetheless. Why are we then surprised when he comes against us in any way? It's time to rise up, ladies.
My challenge to you this week is to be aware of the little things the enemy uses to try to dissuade us from pressing into all the Lord has for us. I'm as guilty as the next one, but this morning, the Lord called me on it. He didn't allow me to take my pink pork belly back to bed and, I have to say, I am so glad that he didn't because I would have missed out on an opportunity to learn something new about Him. Isn't that what it's all about anyway - not just learning about him, but also, learning him?
So forge ahead! Rise up! Sally forth! Put the pedal to the metal! Haul buns!..........uhmmm.... okay, that's all I've got, but you get the message. Meanwhile, I'll be here, peeling off this shirt and discovering a new appreciation for the people who stuff the sausage. Tomorrow morning I think I'll stick with bacon. I'm just saying, painful memories and all....... till then, I'm
Soaked in His blessings,
Spokenfor
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